Tuesday, November 22, 2005

Jamba Juice Holiday Smoothies*

Assuming the topic were Jamba Juice (and it is), the obvious peg would be the Holiday Smoothies: Mighty Cherry Charger ("festive refreshment of succulent cherries, strawberries, & raspberry juice blah blah blah") & Orange Cherry Cheer (cherry+orange, you get the pic). But JJ also has these "functional" smoothies w/ megadoses of protein, Vit C, etc. There’s Coldbuster! and Acai Supercharger, w/ acai, a trendy, purply superfood which has beaucoup antioxidants. Plus ooky-colored green tea smoothies: Matcha Momentum & Matcha Green Tea Blast, w/ 75 mgs of caffeine. Green-tea caffeine = slow build to a low, mildly teeth-gnashing buzz. If you like that kind of thing, they even have green tea shots, sorta like espresso but green

* no photo = slacker jamba publicist no return emails yet

23 Comments:

At November 22, 2005 11:35 AM, Anonymous m.b. said...

Awww T.G., no more mimnt!?

 
At November 22, 2005 12:04 PM, Anonymous Dean said...

Yes! I beat the Captain

 
At November 22, 2005 12:26 PM, Blogger Tom Cruise said...

So I know you are all tired from standing in line until midnight so you could get a DVD copy of my "War of the Worlds," which was released today. Thank you for being here, as expected. To those of you who were injured in the frenzy and didn't get a copy, call my pub and she'll send you out a coupon or something. Some things I'd like you to note about the DVD, however: I told Steven Spielberg NOT to include spanish and french subtitles, so don't blame me for that. I fought vigorously against them. Also, I asked that the two-disc collectors edition include some nudie shots of me, but that was also deemed a no go. So beware if you shell out the $40 for that piece of crap, it's not worth it. And lastly, my co-star Dakota Fanning was really, REALLY hot for me. But she just doesn't have that youthful glow that my Katie does. Sorry, babe. But points to you for trying.

 
At November 22, 2005 12:38 PM, Anonymous no fan of TC said...

Uh Tom helloooo how are we supposed to know who your pub is. You fired your sister, REMEMBER? sheesh

 
At November 22, 2005 12:38 PM, Anonymous Katie Holmes said...

fuck off Tom

 
At November 22, 2005 12:56 PM, Anonymous clairevoyant said...

purple = barney
hee hee

 
At November 22, 2005 1:00 PM, Anonymous Tennille said...

Big deal Dean, I do that every night:)

 
At November 22, 2005 1:05 PM, Anonymous tg said...

clairevoyant, can you get to the botom of why the jamba juice publicist won't return his emails? we coulda used a smoothie foto/product shot here

 
At November 22, 2005 1:08 PM, Anonymous paris hilton said...

I once dyed my toy poodle green, for a bitchin St. Patrick's Day party in Belize

 
At November 22, 2005 1:14 PM, Blogger Tom Cruise said...

Hi No Fan, contact my publicist and she'll tell you whom it is you're supposed to contact. Please try not to bother me with too many questions. I know it's hard.

 
At November 22, 2005 1:15 PM, Blogger Twisted Dog said...

NEVER HAVE SEX WITH A GREEN POODLE. THAT'S ALL I HAVE TO SAY.

 
At November 22, 2005 1:51 PM, Anonymous Anna Nicole said...

Have you ever been to the Pink Poodle in San Francisco, Twisted?

 
At November 22, 2005 2:13 PM, Anonymous m.b. said...

Anna Nicole, Twisted Dog's not like that!

 
At November 22, 2005 2:21 PM, Blogger Twisted Dog said...

ACTUALLY, THAT'S IN SAN JOSE, NICOLE. I'VE NEVER BEEN, BUT I'D BE HAPPY TO MEET YOU THERE.

 
At November 22, 2005 2:39 PM, Blogger Scott Roche said...

A professional jello shooter kit link. Bravo!

 
At November 22, 2005 3:20 PM, Blogger Twisted Link said...

I was hanging out at La Duni with a very hip friend of mine in early June of 2002 when she said something like, Oh my god. And I was all like, WHAT??? "It's Tom Cruise!" she said, "And Stephen Spielberg!" They had walked right past me and I had looked right through them. I did manage to catch the back of Tom's head, though. And I'll tell you, I wasn't very impressed.

 
At November 22, 2005 3:40 PM, Anonymous clairevoyant said...

tg,
could it be that they are hurriedly concocting a cranberry-gobbler flavored smoothie for thanksgiving, and have no time? or, perhaps she and tom's publicist are one and the same?

 
At November 22, 2005 3:43 PM, Anonymous soofsayer said...

CLAIREVOYANT BLOWS THE LID OFF THE LAZY-PUBLICIST SCHEME!

 
At November 22, 2005 4:11 PM, Blogger Kirk said...

Twisted Link:

I am fairly certain that many men have seen the back of Tom's head. When the lights were on, that is.

 
At November 22, 2005 4:35 PM, Blogger Twisted Link said...

OK, that's really good. HA

 
At November 22, 2005 4:36 PM, Blogger Twisted Dog said...

QUIT TYPING IN ALL CAPS, SOOF!!!

 
At November 23, 2005 5:31 AM, Anonymous Mimi Rogers said...

Tom's a bottom, but likes to be on his back.

Isn't that right Tommy?

 
At November 23, 2005 10:43 AM, Blogger Tom Cruise said...

Yeah, I love La Duni. That chick makes wicked desserts. Crappy town though. Oliver Stone has no taste.

 

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