Vault
It’s hard to imagine a bev more vile than the latest dreck from Coke: Vault Zero, "an artificially flavored sugar free hybrid energy soda". Hybrid? Like, what -- it doesn’t run on gasoline? Coke's just trying to do a Mt Dew (it doesn't even have the Red Bull taurine mix), but it didn't work when it was called Surge either. How bad is it? 1. sickly color (see action photo at left). makes anti-freeze look appetizing. 2. toxic ingredients. to wit: 2 ingreds that end w/ "acid" + aspartame + caffeine + warning "contains phenyketonurics". Why not some DDT while yer at it? Where's the skull & bones? 3. tastes. like. Gatorade. who drinks Gatorade cuz they like the taste? Perhaps the Vault w/ sugar is better. But jeez, can Coke do anything right? And where’s that friggin Blak stuff
posted by TG @ 6:14 AM
17 comments
17 Comments:
Have you ever seen the actual color of Red Bull? It's not a pretty sight either.
Could the "Vault Zero" name be a play on this urban legend?
Is this competing with Mountain Dew? Or MDX
I LOVE TO DRINK ME SOME ANTIFREEZE!
Mike, i noticed that MDX has some of that taurine/guarine that's in Red Bull. vault doesn't. it has "concentrated orange juice" which is in mountain dew. so i'm gonna say it's going up against mountain dew
Kirk, interesting link - i forgot about "Mello Yello". it's like coke keeps making the same loser drink over and over!
WATCH OUT FOR YOUR SHOES, HO.
Another failed COKE bit! Bring back NEW COKE...
My favorite part of this item is the way the color of the "Vault Zero" lettering matches the color of the bottle. Nice coordination! Never liked Coke. Pepsi either.
This drink isn't new. I saw it in 2005.
Anonymous...
Isn't THAT special?
I guess we're not going to see anything new here today.
It would be nice to get some news about a new product. Something about espresso or ice cream or a new resetaurant in Dallas. As advertised.
I predict you've been waiting a long time, haven't you?
Why say "ice cream or restaurants in Dallas". False advertising! But seems like we're not going to be getting anything today.
Waiting:
I predict you look like a quail.
Maybe you should get your own blog. Or join the service, where waiting is tuned to a fine art. Or so I am told.
And don't forget... I know where you live.
I predict that waiting is 13 years old, which means that waiting has been waiting for 13 years.
And dick has been a dick his whole life.
This has replaced Mtn Dew in all the machines at work. I had learned to accept that "The Dew," while disgusting, would give me a nice caffeine high when I was desperate. I bit the bullet and shot a vault, which sucked.
This is all good, b/c it will force me to get more sleep rather than relying on mid-day caffeine slugs, right?
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